10 Tips To Plan The Hawaii Wedding You Really Want (without getting overwhelmed)
Once you say “YES” to your lover’s “Wanna marry me,” immediately you have to start making decisions.
From fun questions, “Where are we honeymooning?” to difficult ones, “Who are we (not) inviting to our celebration?”
All of your simple everyday questions become incredibly more complex when added to your elopement or wedding scenario. What do I wear? Who am I hanging out with? What am I eating? Take heart! There are a lot of ways to avoid the stress and overwhelming decision fatigue that tends to accompany planning one of the most significant days of your life.
Let’s get started!
My first bonus tip is: It’s okay to be overwhelmed, to take breaks, and to ask for help. You are human, and your community is rooting for you!
10 Tips from a Wedding Photographer:
1. Make a list of priorities + non-negotiables
The first and most important step is to have a discussion with your partner to seriously decide together what is actually important to you.
Whether it’s “celebrating our connection” or “feeling a sense of adventure” or “enjoying time with close friends", these are all wonderful priorities—but extremely different outcomes.
Deciding the goal of your wedding day beforehand is a great way to keep you both on track to experience a day you will love forever.
2. Make a list of delegatable tasks
Whether the problem is that you aren’t comfortable with delegation, or you really don’t know what you need help with… It’s easy for those offers from family (and your partner) to help out slip by.
Take some time to think through tasks you can give away so when the next aunty asks if they can help, you can say, “Well, actually… *whips out list*”
things like:
Compiling a list of vendors to look through
Bookmarking helpful articles you should read
Any pickups/deliveries of wedding goods or guests
Creating, crafting or thrifting DIY elements
Addressing and putting stamps on envelopes
Setup and breakdown on the day-of
Point of contact for guests the day-of (so no one is panic calling you)
3. Choose vendors who you vibe with & will have your back
Hiring people who align with your values and have your back is an incredibly important part of making sure your wedding day goes smoothly! Your wedding vendor team are invaluable players on the day of—Because they will do everything to make sure your wedding is incredible. Especially if you are planning an elopement with just you two, make sure the team you choose will treat you like the family you are.
4. Hire Local
If possible, I always recommend getting vendors who are local to the area you are eloping in. Especially when it comes to hiring a photographer, one who is local to your destination is absolutely key for the most authentic experience of your elopement/wedding destination. This is because your photographer is usually the one helping you plan where to go and what to do! By hiring a local photographer, you are getting the true inside scoop not just for locations but local recommendations on the real good food & (importantly) coffee 😜
5. Comparison is the thief of joy
Your wedding is not like anyone else’s because you are the only you. With social media and Pinterest, it’s too easy to fall into the comparison trap. I dealt with it with my wedding too!
Embrace and interact with the special and unique features that make your wedding your own—that’s what’s really Pinterest-worthy.
6. Get away from it all
Take time away from planning and figuring out the details and looking at color swatches…
And take a breath.
Recall why you are here, right now: You’re in love with someone pretty great, and something wonderful is happening.
Take the day off, find your person, and just be in love with them. Forget for a second about the event that celebrates your relationship + simply celebrate your relationship.
7. Ask for an outside opinion
It’s like when someone asks what you want to eat, “I don’t know.” So they suggest Wendy’s, and you realize you may not know what you want… but you know what you don’t want 🤣
If you are feeling stuck or like you can’t make a decision, seek help!
You have the answer, it just needs a little coaxing to come out.
Ask your partner, a trusted friend who has fresh eyes on the situation, or you could always schedule a call with me if you need an encouraging voice to help you figure something out.
8. Get enough sleep!
You’ll probably need some sleep and some water soon. Leave the stressful decision-making (and the blue light!) for the night and get a good night’s sleep. You can get back to the decisions in the morning with fresh eyes and glowing skin.
9. Designate a week-of or day-of coordinator
Even if you are eloping, I highly recommend that you take the full week before your big day to transition from planner to lover. People tell you not to sweat the small stuff, and you won’t have to if you hire a professional or designate someone you trust to run the details of the week-of or the day-of.
Take a load off and enjoy this to the fullest.
10. Make your wedding serve you—not the other way around
Hey wait—This day is for you! Check on yourself and your partner as you go. Make sure your wedding day is serving you, not that you are serving it. Make the decisions that make you and your partner feel closer, more in love, and completely at ease. Cater to the rhythm of your souls, not to the expectations of others.
Do what rings true and everything else will fall in place. You got this.
If you’re eloping in Hawai’i and want some help with the overwhelm, feel free to reach out. I can’t wait to hear from you! x
mar
